Cat Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 It looks like for the first time since I started learning to cook (maybe age 8? 10? ), I will not be making anything for this Thanksgiving meal. Unless I WANT to... for us just at home. Our bigDD and her husband will be not only hosting but cooking it all.. No turkey to buy, no pies to bake, no salad or stuffing to make... VERY strange... On the downside - probably not many leftovers in my fridge... I wonder if I'll do this OK. Or if I will be "compelled" to pick up an after-Thanksgiving-sale turkey and do it all again myself... the week after...? Quote Link to comment
sassenach Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 ah, a dilemma of the sort I know you can enjoy at your leisure.....yea, right........ what IS that? Quote Link to comment
Annarchy Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 You'll do just fine, Cat. I have faith in you. Sort of like what MIL is doing to me. She has bought a pre-made rotisserie turkey with all the trimmings, so all I have to do is heat it up for dinner. I am playing with the idea of baking some chocolate chip cookies. Just because. Maybe that will make me feel better about not having to cook all day. LOL Quote Link to comment
Mt_Rider Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 (edited) Well....kinda relating to y'all. But then, my mom has never gotten off the hook for cooking the turkey. Too many barriers ...too many things .... By the time DH and I moved back within travel range to my folks, I could not in any way cook THE T-DINNER! So......especially as the years [decades] go by, we try to make sure my mom only has to do turkey [& cranberry sauce cuz no one else knows how she does it....which I told her she needs to tell me this year] . We've tried the grocery store pre-cooked dinner that you just heat. Certain folks didn't like it....taste was not right. Tried to go out to restaurant....and that also just was not acceptable to certain key folks. So we have been trying to share the jobs and that seems to work the best. We've also simplified as much as we can. Long ago we gave up the stuffing INSIDE the bird so no one has to get up that early. We have only the cranberry sauce, picklesNstuff, store buns...for sides. Basic turkey, taters/gravy, box stuffing. Pie in a box that goes in the oven later. (tho we buy the better brand names) This year it will be buffet style: go fill plates from the kitchen and sit down to eat. No serving dishes to wash. Personally, I'd agree to anything [well, the store turkey dinner didn't taste very good actually]....if it would take the strain off of all of us. We have two of us definitely "getting older" and two of them acknowledging the term "elderly". It's nicer if the meal does not use up 3 days worth of our energy. Nice to have the energy to sit and talk with each other afterwards....not have to take a nap. Most folks my parents ages have passed or are in nursing/retirement homes. Keeping up their own home yet...it's a blessing but beginning to wear them out. We've come a LONG ways from me actually GROWING THE PUMPKIN for the homemade pies.... But when all is said and done....it's about the fellowship of the day, with each other and with gratitude to our God. MtRider ....enjoy it any way you can get it, ladies! Participate any way you want to!!!! Edited November 23, 2014 by Mt_Rider Quote Link to comment
Cat Posted November 23, 2014 Author Share Posted November 23, 2014 Yeah, Mt_Rider - make sure you get the "how-to"s... One of the saddest things in family get-togethers is losing some recipe that everybody enjoys. Our DD is collecting some of her favorites from me as time goes on. Quote Link to comment
Jeepers Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Cat, Cat, Cat. Sit back, put your feet up, relax and let the pampering begin. After all of these years you DO deserve it. And it will thrill your DD to do something nice for her mom! You can do this. LOL Typed from "someone" who is a control freak needs to be in charge needs things to be done the 'correct' way wants to be sure everyone is having a good time never mind! Offer to wash the dishes. Quote Link to comment
Momo Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 That happened to me last year Cat. We ate at our friends house on Thursday. Then Friday I made a 20 pounder for us. We both love turkey so much! Quote Link to comment
Cat Posted November 24, 2014 Author Share Posted November 24, 2014 "Pampering"... funny choice of words. I had an old HS classmate tell me how she just loves to be "pampered"... Her DH had a serious accident and she was telling me this as she is nursing him back to better mental and physical stability. She misses being "pampered". I didn't know how to respond, so I just let the comment go in the conversation, but afterwards I was turning it over & over in my mind. Pampered? I don't even know what that is. I have never been "pampered" in my life, unless it was when I visited in Brazil. Even there, I tried to help when I could. But pampered? What IS that? I was supposed to be cared for after a difficult delivery of our first child. He was a "breech" baby, and the there was a problem when they gave me a spinal epidural anesthesia. They fixed it the next day, but I was supposed to be *totally* cared for for several days after returning home. Mom offered to help. Yeah. We walked in and she had waxed our wooden floors without asking. We nearly fell, nearly dropped the car seat with our newborn. DH scrambled to take up all throw rugs and ended up sanding parts of it. The first day, the only thing she would do was hold the baby, change him, but did nothing to help me. I had to get out of bed to get lunch for both of us. I started laundry that HAD to be done, and when DH came home I was a mess. So he stayed with me until I was healed, which messed up our finances with a lower paycheck. (And we never asked her again.) The other children's births were fine. I adjusted, DH stayed home a day or two. The second miscarriage was traumatic, but DH cared for me. I can't imagine being watched over and cared for in a way that anyone might call "pampered". When I was sick as a child occasionally, it was "buck up"... do what you can, and don't whine. Usually I was caring for the others. I had to care for Mom. Who knows... I might find out what it is. NAAAAAH... That will NEVER happen.... Quote Link to comment
Jeepers Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 I know what you mean about being pampered. Not my style either. I’m too antsy to sit still and I can’t bear to watch someone work without helping. I’d rather take a beating than to ask for help. I’m so independent that I’d much rather do it myself and not owe anyone any favors. But I learned a long time ago that I was being selfish and denying people who really love me the opportunity to show me. Gasp, I think I have a character flaw. I was shown that it gives OTHER people pleasure to feel needed. It does my son’s self-esteem a world of good to help his mom. Not only because it’s a token of love but as a sort of payback for the things I’ve done for him. Now it feels like we need each other and can depend on each other. A more adult relationship I suppose. Usually, no money is involved. He adjusts my TV, mows my lawn, moves heavy boxes, takes my trash away if I forget to set it out or it’s stinky or takes me to McDonalds for lunch. It was the same with my D-ex, friends and some of my cousins. I was always the strong ‘go to’ one and sometimes I resented it. Even though I wouldn’t ask for what I needed. They would offer but of course I could do it myself or I wouldn’t share a problem with them the way they did with me. I didn’t want to be a burden. They would have loved to have given as good as they got if I had only asked. Gees, couldn’t they read my mind! I got older and wiser and believe me…now I speak up. Pampered to me means allowing someone else to do for me, what I could do for myself, just because they love me and want to. I’m not saying any of this is the way you are! I’m just sharing what I’m learning. Try not to let those in the past have a say about who you are today. They don’t get to decide your self-worth. That’s your job. They have already done their damage and you have survived them. You win! OMG…Cat’s a winner!!! Let them go and enjoy your beautiful children who really love you and want to show you. Besides, after your DD has done the holiday thing a few times she will probably throw hints about you taking the reins back again! Enjoy it while it lasts. Quote Link to comment
The WE2's Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 Yeah, Mt_Rider - make sure you get the "how-to"s... One of the saddest things in family get-togethers is losing some recipe that everybody enjoys. Our DD is collecting some of her favorites from me as time goes on. Handed down recipes from family make wonderful Christmas gifts :-) Find yourself some beautiful Christmas paper and print them out on your computer and use them instead of Christmas cards :-) Quote Link to comment
The WE2's Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 I was never "pampered" until I met MrWE2 :-) I was the oldest child, I married at 19 to someone I should never have married (although I do have two children I love) and spent 42 years, -8 in what I call "hard labor" :-( Then I married MrWE2 and he's treated me like a queen. It doesn't mean I don't work beside him (and sometimes very hard) it only means that he never expects me to do anything. If I miss a load of laundry, a vacuuming, whatever...he never says a word. If he thinks it needs to get done he gets up and does it. When I had the surgery he waited on me hand and foot for 10 days, and then watched over me like a hawk for the next 8 weeks. Even did the vacuuming etc., at mother's while I was on light duty. I have no problem being "pampered" by him. By others? No way. I'm fully capable of caring for myself and my homestead. Should the day ever come when I can't ... I ask the Lord to take me on to HIS house and let Him pamper me there! PTL! Quote Link to comment
Mt_Rider Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 Yeah, Mt_Rider - make sure you get the "how-to"s... One of the saddest things in family get-togethers is losing some recipe that everybody enjoys. Our DD is collecting some of her favorites from me as time goes on. Handed down recipes from family make wonderful Christmas gifts :-) Find yourself some beautiful Christmas paper and print them out on your computer and use them instead of Christmas cards :-) Cool idea! IN FACT......might solve one of my Christmas stocking gifts for my brother and niece. Joint effort between me and my mom!! MtRider Quote Link to comment
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