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Parent Drama: Doing Good In Spite Of Abuse

An Update

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#21 Becca_Anne

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 02:17 AM

:bighug2:

#22 blestmomof4

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 12:15 PM

My deepest regret is that I let all the abuse and manipulation and using go on so many yrs. Not just mother, but my sisters and one brother. When I finally said 'no more' I got the boot from the family. Wish it had happened a lot sooner.



We have gone through this with both my DH and my family. After all these years we are done and wish we had done it sooner. Both my parents are now gone but they 'taught' my siblings how to treat me. My husbands brother lives here and hasn't spoke to him in years. DH ran into him at the first of the year and told him that he loved and missed him and that if he did anything to offend him he was truly sorry. We found out shortly after that DH had cancer...during all of it (surgery and long recovery)....not a single word from his brother.

It's sad that my children don't have an extended family but it was family that never really cared about us anyway.

Blessing to you and your DH

#23 The WE2's

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 12:49 PM

I've often asked myself..."what and who are family?" Sometimes I see people mistreat other's and think "I'm sorry" isn't needed because "they're family". Why do people save their worst behavior for family? I try to live my life and treat people like it may be the last time I see them...because it just might be!

(formerly known as Philbe)

Matthew 6:11  "Give us this day our daily bread...amen." 

Phillipians 4:19  "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus....amen"

1 Corinthians 13:4-8  "Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant  or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.  It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things"...let me walk this out Lord.

 


#24 theyd

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 07:42 AM

Wow!! good for you for drawing a line.
After reading all the posting; I now wonder if I have become a large burden to my daugther; unfortantly she has been supporting me for the last three months ... been looking for a job, but no one wants to hire me one age two been out of the work feild to long. Have manage to get a couple of part time jobs. I know she has been worring about her old ma and has been under a lot of stress. And so busy it's unreal. But on a good note finally got her talked into taking some time out with her hubby and take off for a few days. I can and will watch the kids and take care of the animals.
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#25 The WE2's

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 10:49 AM

Good for you Theyd! "Once" I lived for about 6 months with my mom until I found work...and I did all the housework, the laundry and the cooking. She truly hated to see me move! LOL But it's wonderful that you've considered her and her family...so many do not...especially when they get into their 80's and see their lives as "fringe" living. Again, GOOD FOR YOU!

(formerly known as Philbe)

Matthew 6:11  "Give us this day our daily bread...amen." 

Phillipians 4:19  "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus....amen"

1 Corinthians 13:4-8  "Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant  or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.  It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things"...let me walk this out Lord.

 


#26 funkyducky

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Posted 02 December 2012 - 02:49 PM

Wow!! good for you for drawing a line.
After reading all the posting; I now wonder if I have become a large burden to my daugther; unfortantly she has been supporting me for the last three months ... been looking for a job, but no one wants to hire me one age two been out of the work feild to long. Have manage to get a couple of part time jobs. I know she has been worring about her old ma and has been under a lot of stress. And so busy it's unreal. But on a good note finally got her talked into taking some time out with her hubby and take off for a few days. I can and will watch the kids and take care of the animals.


There's a difference between needing help from famiy and taking advantage of them. It sounds like you're receiving help, but are doing everything in your power to help yourself. Are you trying to guilt your daughter into doing more for you? Complaining that she isn't doing enough? Criticizing her for anything and everything? If you answered "No" to those last three questions, then you're not a large burden or pain in the butt - you just need some help for a while. And it's nice that you're watching the kids and animals so she and her DH can get away for a bit. I think you have to become A LOT more demanding and difficult if you want to compete with some of the mothers being posted about here.

#27 Jeepers

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Posted 02 December 2012 - 05:52 PM

Theyd, no comparison between your situation and C4C's. :hug3:

You can't always get what you want, babe

But if you try sometimes, you just might find

You get what you need.

 

~Mick and Keith~




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